Friday the 13th
Granted we still have an hour and a half left of today (for me), but I think I can pretty much state with all certainty that this Friday the 13th has absolutely sucked.
It started off pretty okay! I did cancel my plans of getting my industrial piercing done today because I just didn’t feel like I would have enough time and I’d rather go to the place that I’m going when it’s less busy (most tattoo parlors do $13 tattoos or piercings on Friday the 13th) and for some other reasons.
That was fine.
Then my sister came home from work in a fit of (rightful) anger, sadness, and tears because her most recent friend of the male sort ended things with her out of the blue, over text. Yeah I know. It honestly felt like the beginning of January all over again (for the newer people – https://hafletcher9718.wordpress.com/2015/01/03/time-to-catch-up/) and I just wanted to cry and scream and punch someone all at once (still do).
Then we took Jess out for a walk together and talked about things and I went to lunch with my dad and that was great, I had a churro, life was looking up.
Then I realized, oh fuck I work with this male friend that my sister has been interested in. Fuck me. Great. So I went to work as usual and had to deal with his sorry fucking ass the whole time. I was so pissed, but you’d be so proud of me, No One, I didn’t say anything. I just gave him the cold fucking shoulder. Which I think is one of the meanest tricks in the book.
So I did that, came home after work, did a little bit of homework then went over to check on Jess to make sure that she had enough food for tonight and that the lights were on. I did all of that, but then I was sitting in their living room and I looked up at one of the pictures that they have hanging of Bobby and I just couldn’t do it. I lost it. I felt no I still feel like it’s just happening all over again except this time I don’t have him to comfort me and to tell Hannah that it’ll be okay and it’s just like ugh. It’s days like today that make me feel like I have no one. When everything is just going to shit and I feel like I’m losing my mind in the midst of a panic attack and there’s no one there to say anything to make me feel better. Some people try, don’t get me wrong, and I appreciate the effort, but I just can’t right now.
Today’s been an unlucky day, No One. Thanks for listening.
At least I had a vlogbrothers video to watch today.
Posted on February 14, 2015, in Hope's Commentary and tagged anxiety, bad day, daily, daily blog, day, freaking out, friday the 13th, me, sad, sucked, today, unlucky, upset. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.